Artscape | Into the Fire SEATTLE, WA (KPLU) - The play begins with actors Carrie Gibson and Anthony Curry talking about a soldier's perspective on the battle field.

(Show excerpt)
Carrie: "The average number of rounds shot in any firefight is 33-hundred."
Tony: "That's a lot of bullets flying. So you can't expect us not to be reactive. People have been shooting at us and we've been shooting back."
Carrie: "When they shoot at us, we don't duck and cover."
Tony and Carrie, together: "We walk, into the fire."

Watch a Demo Performance of "Into the Fire"

In that opening sequence, they're quoting Dr. Mike Colson, a former Marine and navy commander who became navy chaplain and then a clinical psychologist for the VA after four tours of duty in Afghanistan and Iraq. The actors found him doing outreach to disabled veterans at the University of Washington in Bothell. Colson says he only saw the play once. But he likes hearing his words in the title sequence. "Because that's really what you're doing every day, you're getting up every day, putting your boots on, you know, speed laces - wrap up - and you're walkin' right into it. And you don't necessarily know what you're walkin' into."
(show excerpt echoes his words)
...Think about that psychologically: when you cut me off in traffic, I want to get up close and piss you off!)

"Dr. Mike" Colson taking a break at the UW Bothell, where the first interviews for "Into the Fire" took place.photo by Bellamy Pailthorp / KPLU

Colson's Story: Invisible Wounds Cause A Sudden Crash

Colson's story frames the play, illustrating how hard it can be for communities to recognize and deal with hidden wounds of war. Aside from a slightly stiff right leg, he doesn't have any obvious outward signs of distress.

He's a type A personality who channeled his anger about losses in the war into earning several doctoral degrees and writing books. He was working for the VA, leading groups of traumatized veterans and helping them work through their issues. But, years after his active duty as a marine, Colson had a sudden relapse of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. It was triggered by his nephew's return from Falluja and subsequent suicide.

Colson says his inability to save his nephew created demons he still hasn't entirely tamed. The vivid nightmares and flashbacks caused him to isolate himself from his wife and two sons for 7 months. He slept in his garage on Camano Island, with a chocolate lab as his only companion.

"I was triggered and completely capsized," he says now of that incident. "And I didn't expect it. Because I'm a provider, you know, I'm a guy who helps people go through these things."

Photos by Bellamy Pailthorp / KPLU

Eleven Stories, Woven into One Performance

Into the Fire is based on interviews with Colson and ten other disabled veterans and their families. It came about as a follow up to an earlier play about disabilities in general that Had to Be Productions performed at UW Bothell. An administrator there convinced them that this had to be their next project, because of the waves of returnees coming home from Iraq and more and more veterans taking advantage of the latest version of the GI bill on campus. Carrie Gibson says the first time they performed "Into the Fire" for an actual military audience, they were terrified.

"We never dreamed we'd be doing this with veterans in the audience," she says. "We thought we were doing it for everyone else, so they could get the issue. And then, for one of our first performances, in walks one uniform, another uniform, a third ... and then, the General."

Photo courtesy of Elsa GibsonBraden

A Commander's Coin for Excellence

Gibson says they were afraid the military brass they were facing would walk out or accuse them of lying. But they were wrong. They each received a coveted award, a navy commander's coin, for their performance. And the generals' reaction made her realize the play they've created transcends politics.

"He said, 'this is about all of us' and he had tears in his eyes," Gibson says, adding that since then, they've been in a general's office in Washington DC with three other generals, who were crying.

"So, for us, it's such a human issue and it's humanized our image of people so completely, I mean, it's just been amazing."

She says they now carry the coins in their pockets during every performance. And they click them together at the beginning of each show, for good luck.

Challenging Material to Spark Discussions and De-stigmatize

The play challenges managers and the general public to acknowledge how much time veterans may need to heal - and that the path to wellness might not be all straight and narrow. Even when someone looks like they're functioning fine, certain things can cause outbursts or make trauma silently fester. The creators say they're glad that returning troops aren't being spit upon as they were after Vietnam. But they also don't want people to worship all veterans as heroes. Actors Carrie Gibson and "Tony" Anthony Curry have taken those ideas to heart.

They are so well-rehearsed as improve artists, they often complete each other's sentences.

"The Basic goal is, this is a national dialogue that we've never had," says Carrie. "Yes," says Tony.

I ask, "What do you want people to take away from your performance, after they've seen the show and discussed it?"

Carrie is quick to answer.

"I want them to get that we're all responsible for the re-integration. That means we have to take a step back. We have to take some time, look at our policies, our rules -- whatever it is. And we have to realize that we've got to make more room for healing. And the biggest thing is: one of the characters says it, 'we've gotta get over the stigma.'"

She says then people can reach out and get the help they need without worrying about what ends up on their record.

"Had to be Productions" is aiming to perform "Into the Fire" before members of Congress this year - and eventually get an audience in The White House.

Why Theater?

When asked why documentary theater is the best way to do this work, and not some other medium, such as film, the actors say it enables them to have eye contact with the audience and facilitate honest and open dialogue afterward. Because the work brings us close to such critical issues, they say that aspect is paramount.

For more information:

Had to Be Productions

PTSD Resources from Dr. Mike

More on Mike Colson's Books

The Seattle Times: War's mental wounds command new attention

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